Famous Last Words
“Bugger Bognor.” King George V.
“It hurts.” Charles de Gaulle. The only man in France to be named after an airport.
“I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis”. Humphrey Bogart.
“Wait ’till I have finished my problem!” Archimedes of Syracuse.
“How were the circus receipts in Madison Square Gardens?” Phineas Barnum.
“Never felt better.” Douglas Fairbanks.
“I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.” Richard Feynman.
“Leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub.” Conrad Hilton.
“Channel 5 is all shit, isn’t it?” Adam Faith.
“Dying’s tough, but not as tough as doing comedy”. Edmund Gwenn, actor.
“I think that I could eat one of Bellamy’s meat pies.” Pitt the Younger.
“I am about to, or I am going to, die: either expression is correct”. Dominique Bouhours.
“Dying is a very dull dreary affair. My advice to you is to have nothing to do with it. Somerset Maugham.
“Die, my dear doctor? That is the last thing I shall do.” Lord Palmerston.
“It has all been very interesting.” Lady Mary Montagu.
“Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him”. John Barrymore
“Well, gentlemen, you are about to see a baked Appel.” George Appel, shortly before the electric chair was switched on.
“Why not? Yeah”. Timothy Leary.
“They couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist. . . . ” General John Sedgwick.
“Wait a minute….” Pope Alexander VI.
“Either that wallpaper goes or I do.” Oscar Wilde.
Sometimes, though, the retiring party doesn’t get in the last word.
Frederick the Great was a dedicated and devoted tyrant. Near the end of his days, when he was very ill, he asked his doctor; “I suppose you have helped many a man into another world”.
“Not so many as Your Majesty,” replied the surgeon. “Nor with so much pleasure as in this particular case.”